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lesmodsalouette) wrote in
bellelurette2025-04-07 12:11 am
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Epilogue
EPILOGUE
Your stopped time has restarted. Whether you were in the grassy field or fighting for your life on the castle grounds, you'll suddenly find yourself in an untouched area of the gardens. Ish is back, and so are the items, and the dead.
You return to Chateau Ambregris with the certain knowledge that come Monday, you will greet a new week, in a home of your own choosing. No longer will the chime of the clocks hunt you down, no longer will the oppressive scent of roses haunt your senses, no longer will you be forced to watch the death of those you've come to love and hate.
Parting is such a bittersweet sorrow, isn't it?
Make merry one last time, in this castle of illusions. Ironically, your memories of this stolen time that never existed are the one thing that will truly remain to you.
END NOTES
๐ฎ All dead are revived as tsukumogami! Congrats on your immortality(?)
๐ฎ Any other contracts made with Ish will be honored
๐ฎ Characters may choose to leave for any world they desire.
๐ฎ Time has not passed while you were stuck in this loop!
๐ฎ There will be no cross-dimensional world travel, except for on Samhain (Witches New Year October 31st/November 1st). On these dates, Ish will enable everyone to visit each other's world freely.
๐ฎ Universal Communication will be possible, courtesy of Manba and Ish. Everyone who wants one will be given a small fox that can communicate with other foxes through voice and video; the foxes can talk and are fairly simple creatures, enjoy them and give them fried tofu once in a while.
๐ฎ Powers are on for the finale, but Ish will step in and yeet anyone who gets too out of hand back to their homeworld, so play nice! (or relatively nice. )
๐ฎ Any other contracts made with Ish will be honored
๐ฎ Characters may choose to leave for any world they desire.
๐ฎ Time has not passed while you were stuck in this loop!
๐ฎ There will be no cross-dimensional world travel, except for on Samhain (Witches New Year October 31st/November 1st). On these dates, Ish will enable everyone to visit each other's world freely.
๐ฎ Universal Communication will be possible, courtesy of Manba and Ish. Everyone who wants one will be given a small fox that can communicate with other foxes through voice and video; the foxes can talk and are fairly simple creatures, enjoy them and give them fried tofu once in a while.
๐ฎ Powers are on for the finale, but Ish will step in and yeet anyone who gets too out of hand back to their homeworld, so play nice! (or relatively nice. )
[OOC: Welcome to your epilogue! The timeloop is ended, the evil has been defeated, and you have some time to catch your breath in the castle before the rest of your life begins! ]
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[ as if he isn't kissing back, almost as light but. he's not nearly as skilled in this as hwylryn is and he can't help himself.
his own arms are around hwylryn's hips, snug and secure. ]
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The tiger does wonder if the Witch is as handsome and as charming as the rumors say . . .
( The corner of his jaw, the space by his ear . . . )
. . . And if the Witch is doing well, when all is said and done.
( me: oh my god he wouldn't not flirt but i *grabbing the bull by the horns* BACK ON TOPIC FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE )
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-here between the two of them, he shouldn't deny his feelings. it's safe for him here. ]
...I think the Witch will be better. eventually. [ better in the sense that he'll be more fulfilled, better in the sense that he'll have just happiness in his ribcage and not a dull ache.
he dips down not for a kiss, but to curl into hwlyrn's neck. very snake behavior, but he wants the warmth being humanoid provides. ]
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He's quiet, for a few moments, wishing none of this pain was meant for Ish. )
... Did you get to talk to her the way you wanted?
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I told myself I'd be happy just seeing her again, and I was, but... I still don't understand the choice she's made, to sleep forever and leave everything behind. I would understand if she didn't want revenge, I would understand if she wanted to dispose of me, but I don't think I'll ever understand why she wanted to just give up.
I can forgive her for everything else. [ maybe he's even a little angry? they had precious little time to argue, but he definitely spent some of it trying to change her mind, fruitlessly. ]
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So he understands. He understands so much, it hurts like it'd just happened to him.
And he understands, too, as someone on the verge of giving up this entire time.
He strokes Ish's hair, voice soft. )
She couldn't explain why?
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deep breath- ]
She's never been good at being a "goddess", that's why she created attendants. But after the last fallout with humans, she couldn't take it anymore. She thought that the only way she could understand them was to become one, even though I was right there.
I understood them the most, I still do. [ as much as he is a clown, being able to read emotions is his specialty and in a way, what he was made for. ]
But rather than trust me, or just keep trying on her own, she put herself back into the cycle of rebirth. That's how it is in the world where I'm from, once you die, your soul gets reincarnated as long as it doesn't require tuning, until it's reached nirvana.
So all this time, after I woke up, I was waiting for her to reborn. And when she finally was...the girl who had her soul was nothing like her. She was loud, brutish, opinionated, stubborn [ he's extremely biased here, it's fine. ] . She was the one who kept looping back time before I came here, because she inherited that power from Norna.
I played a game with her, in order to get her soul. I didn't need her specifically, so I broke her slowly bit, by bit, by bit. When I finally wonโshe just disappeared from the cycle completely, because of a deal she struck with Rune. So I killed him too, but it was too late.
That's why I had to do all of this, I had to rewind time all the way back to when Norna was actually whole. But her answer was still the same, even if the ending this time meant she would cease to exist at all.
cw suicidal ideation obliquely
The cycle of reincarnation sounds faintly perverse to him, though he knows that's not the point of that story. He wonders if he could kill a reincarnation of Balthazar or Gwawlyn; and, in the same breath, he wonders if he could even accept them. What Ish has gone through now - changing in his matter, feeling more like Norna in the scope of his powers, if not his essence, as he does now - is what feels correct, to Hwylryn.
He thinks in quiet, for a brief time. )
... Balthazar was the same. ( He says, finally, softly. ) And... I suspected, Gwawlyn would be, too. It's why I never wished for them, even if it could be done.
( Could Ish resurrect the dead, so long as the dead were short of a goddess with a misplaced soul? It doesn't matter. It'd end the same, whether wizard or dragon; mortal or goddess.
Why wouldn't the dead simply return as they were?
His pursed lips twist into a sort of smile, bittersweet. Upset, yet understanding; heartbroken, yet likewise defiant.
Why didn't they want to return? Because the heartbreak is just too much. That's it. That's simple. There's no more reason why. Why does the mountain's river end in a lake? Why doesn't it go on a little longer? Why don't the currents push a little harder, and try to force further through?
It's just content where it is. Even if that means it dries out. )
... But you have her, still.
( He takes issue with only one thing Ish has said - that she has ceased to exist. )
She is not in the form that she was. She is not here to tell you good morning, or good night, or to go into town with. But she has passed on what she can give to you. I can feel you, and you are rich with her.
( And perhaps that is right, too. He had said already that there is no clear place within Ish's weave where Norna ends and Ish begins - and now it is true, once again. )
In my home, creatures of magic that die turn to beautiful, concentrated stone. If I die, I will turn to one, too. They're rich with the essence of what that creature wasโ their power; their magic; their memories.
There is nothing crueler than to leave a stone aside. ( In Northern tradition, anyway. ) There is nothing kinder than to take the dead into yourself, and carry them with you.
( He noses Ish, pressing a kiss to his head. )
You've rescued her essence from that sea of reincarnation. And you've taken her along with you. She cannot tell you good morning or good night, but she is still with you here now, as I hold you like this. She will be with you when you show me around Ecumene. And what exists of her in you can dream, and you will feel that she does in your heart, and in your magic.
( His eyes are a little wet (when aren't they, really), but he exhales soft, and warm. )
... At least, that's what I've come to know, and what I've come to believe. Even if it doesn't make up for their absence... it's not nothing. It's not gone.
( It's hard. It's different. But it's not gone. And in the finality of death, maybe - maybe - maybe that's all you can ask for. )
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[ that wasn't the main takeaway from everything that's been sad, but it's what he clings to. ]
I hadn't heard her voice in so long and now I never will again. I have all the powers she once had, but part of me feels so empty. She was my everything even if she wouldn't even give me a name.
[ he closes his eyes, drops falling on his cheeks. ] .
...if I didn't have you, I would have let her take me. I pushed back against her, even though part of me wishes I didn't.
I love you, so please...stay with me. You're the only one who understands.
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It must have hurt at least as much as it hurts Hwylryn now to hear that a part of Ish wishes he'd let her erase him. )
... I'm not going anywhere. ( He holds him even tighter, as if to anchor them both. ) I'm sorry I scared you.
( A kiss pressed to Ish's hair - shh, shh... )
I won't turn to stone. Not ever. So don't you disappear on me. And when it gets hard, I'll hold you, just like this. ( A kiss, again. ) We'll never be alone again. All right?
( And if it ever gets too hard, for Ish, or Junior... then the three of them can depart together. That's what Hwylryn would like to believe. They won't leave a single one behind - though, he'd prefer it if they all remained alive.
But those are plans for one day; not now. Not when they haven't even yet begun. )
... So... thank you for staying here with me.
( For pushing back. If Norna had returned and Ish was gone, then... those plans for one day would have had to become plans for now, he thinks. Not a single one left behind.
A kiss, a kiss, a kiss, stroking his hair. Cry if you need to; but, don't mourn him. He isn't gone. He won't be. Do you feel him? )
... Why wouldn't she name you?
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he curls a little closer into the warmth. part of him hates feeling this vulnerable, but another part of him is realizing how relieving it is to be touched in this spot he's kept buried. ]
Well...it wasn't malicious. [ he laughs, because if he didn't laugh what else could he do? ] Ever other attendant had a name besides me, given to them for their purpose. I was born from a marriage, so I didn't get one.
And when I would ask her, she said she would think on it. She thought on it for seventy years, and every day the answer would be the same. She called me snake, which she thought was good enough.
It was a human that named me and it was that same human that betrayed her shortly thereafter. But I've never been able to give up my name, even if part of me still wants to. I don't receive things very often, just because.
[ by very often he pretty much means, never. it's why the simple gift of an earring, something made for and given exclusively to him, pried open his ribcage and heart. ]
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... If you like it, you should keep it.
( His hand comes to rest at the back of his head, gently cupping it there. )
... I wish it weren't so conflicting for you. I wish that didn't have to be one of the only things you received.
( A soft exhale, pressing his face into Ish's hair!!! )
... You know I want to give you enough to make up for what you haven't, with interest. ( This isn't referencing any past conversation - he's decided it now - but surely Ish must know that's Hwylryn's instinct. ) But I don't... understand why they'd give you a name, then turn on her. Didn't they know she's important to you?
cw; vore yay
They knew, and she was important to them too. But...Norna's intentions were always good, but oftentimes they were too straightforward. She'd get overwhelmed easily and act impulsively, which is what happened the night they turned on her.
The King wanted her hand in marriage, but the other tribes objected to itโit'd cause a huge power imbalance if one nation was wedded to a Goddess. They went back and forth for a while until Norna demanded they stop because she had a solution.
She'd take every single human into herself, she'd consume them, and by doing so there would be no more cause for strife or disagreement. They'd be with her forever and all apart of her, in neverending peace.
That's what she would have done to me, if you didn't change her mind.
cw vore... obliquely...
He turns his face against Ish's head, pressing a kiss to his temple, or close as he can manage. )
... And I'm glad you didn't let her. I'd have had to beg her to take me and Junior in, too.
( And who knows if she'd be amicable to that at that particular juncture or not. )
I don't know if I can ask for as much credit as I'd like. It was all I could do to keep myself from...
( Honestly? Throwing himself at her full on and just like, pulling her hair and telling her to give Ish back - not out of hate, but out of scared desperation that he might never see Ish ever again. He has so many violent impulses in general he keeps chained because he knows it's not helpful and it also killed Gwawlyn, but god if he wasn't all nerves.
... He hugs Ish a little tighter, cheek against him. )
... I was so scared she wasn't going to give you back. But I felt terrible for wanting it, too, knowing you wanted to be with her.
( He doesn't know if he should feel guilty or relieved - he couldn't live through Ish resigning to death, in a sense, like Gwawlyn and Balthazar, but now he's forced Ish to live. Andโ...
And... like Gwawlyn, Balthazar, and Norna...
... )
... And you wouldn't...
( He trails off, pensive, seeing for a moment beyond the gardens - a future where maybe Hwylryn's love isn't enough to keep him going.
The mere echo of the thought is enough to begin tears in his eyes. )
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I don't want to see either of you hurt or worse, especially because of me. [ he's known that the love of his life is like this, but it's something else to hear it so plainly when they were an arms dealers performance away from it being reality.
the hug at least, gets him to relax a bit even if he's still holding hwylryn tight against him. ]
I want to be with you, too. [ he won't tell him not to cry but he is going to try to nuzzle away those tears. ]
I told you to teach me how to be greedy, remember? Turns out I'm a fast learner. [ he jokes, but it's true. every time they kiss, every time hwylryn has marked him either physically or otherwise, it's gotten harder and harder to imagine a sunset or a dawn without him. ]
...and now I'm all yours. But if I could ask one thingโI want you all the time, always. I could survive if you turned yourself to other whims...maybe even people [ maybe he says, because hwylryn being possessive is infectious. ] , but I wouldn't be happy.
...your love isn't too much for me. I want all of it and each day I only want more.
[ he's so hungry, so starved for it, and if all of this with norna has made him realize one thing, it's that he's tired of pretending he's not. ]
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When there was Gwawlyn, when there was Balthazar, there had been Hwylryn alone. But... well, he would have been happy to simply stand beside someone else, whether or not they looked back at him. But Ish, as ever, spoils him - he looks back; he takes his hand, and supports him. To hear Ish say Hwylryn could even entertain the idea of wandering is silly - how could he, when he's so fully captivated by Ish now?
The tears roll slight, but his lips curl into a watery smile. )
If you have such an appetite, how could I want to do anything but try to satisfy it? Who else would I have time to feed but you? ... You'll have all my time. All my love, if you can't become sick of it. And no one else will have it.
You should ask for more. Because this much was already promised to you.
( Without Ish even needing to ask. Who else could he possibly want in this precise way he wants Ish? In what other way could he be fulfilled? )
... But this is my greed, tooโ not wanting to exist in a world without you.
( In this, he is resolute. After Gwawlyn, he'd had enough. Balthazar, he had thought was his final chance - instead, through miracle alone, it is now Ish. And there will be no other beyond that. )
... Can I be cruel? Can I ask you to keep going on if it's hard, as long as I'm there, too? If I do the same thing from you?
I think... our love can keep us light. Keep us buoyed. ( ... But. ) If there comes a time we need to sink, ( if there's no other way, ) I want to sink together.
Please?
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he won't hold it for too long because he needs to respond to the rest, but the little nibble he gives his dragon's tongue might be his way of saying "look forward to later". the marks on his neck are somewhat faded, helped along by his magic. latter is likely soon for both of them.
but ah, the restโish needs to sit with it for a moments, not the least of which is him distracting himself, but he does. he spends the time tracing a finger carefully along hwylryn's features, his cheeks, his nose, his lips, his jaw. he feels like he knows all their shapes and contours already and he tries to imagine a future where he can't do this anymore, where he's alone again.
he sighs.
he could persist, because he's good at doing so. a character flaw rather than a character trait. but is it worth it? ]
Hwylryn... [ he's struggling here, because on this they're on opposite poles rather than in sync. ]
I'll always want to keep going for you. [ that's the easy part. ] But the sinking...I have a hard time imagining that.
[ the undying optimist in him.
he needs to hear more before committing to that end. ]
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( Of course he'd returned the kiss - gladly, and with equal passion; and every time he tries to edge Ish out by offering even more than he's given, it feels like Ish only gives more in turn. It's an indulgent competition he's pleased to be locked in, and not one he'd been eager to pull from. The teeth scraping against his tongue is a spark that runs down his throat and straight to his chest - it incited something primal in him; something he'd wanted to return, impatient.
But Ish had something to think on, and he likes Ish's thoughts (even should they ever turn to something that worried Hwylryn). )
... It's scary. ( His voice keeps calm, but his eyes remain still a little watery, and his heart thumps heavy. ) Balthazar and Norna chose to return to their absence. ( Die, once more. ) And... Ish, what if I'm not enough? What if I can't keep your head above water?
( He believes Ish when he says he wants to keep going for Hwylryn - and it makes him happy. It does!
But they're both full of grief, from recent loss. He hopes Ish understands. )
... And if there's nothing I can do for you then, if there's really no other way... then I want to go with you.
( ... What Hwylryn doesn't address here is himself: that Ish and he are in similar positions of recent loss, fresh from recent fantasies of nonexistence, only altered from their course by love and connection; so, if Hwylryn is so concerned Ish's grief may one day prove too heavy for his weight, Ish really ought to be concerned for Hwylryn, too. And, if Ish shouldn't - if he truly has nothing to fear - then maybe Hwylryn should have more faith in Ish, in turn.
But he can't help but be scared. For Ish; of a world where he might be without Ish for even a second. So he wants reassurance - that if they go, they go together. At least it would not be so unbearable then. )
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he'll accept it all in the paradoxical way where it will never be too much or too little. just like how they fit together, ish finds it perfect and only finds it more and more perfect every second they're together. ]
But to the reverse...I'd do everything I could and beyond that, you know? [ he'd break new taboos that haven't even been invented yet. even still, he'll admit that it's a fear he has. not that he won't be enough (because in a way he will always think that), but that this is just the natural course of a force of nature like hwylryn.
so ish thinks, takes a breath and lays a hand to hwylryn's chest, where he can feel his heart beating with his sigil carved into it. ]
...if you want to amend our vows to death does not us apart, I can agree to that. We won't be apart in life or death and our souls will forever be curled around each other, until all the universes cease to be and beyond that.
[ maybe that almost sounds like the same thing, but it's not to ish. instead of him framing it as a defeat, a giving up, he can look to it as an "to be continued, eternal". ]
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... I'd like that. Can we?
( He noses Ish, his fear turned to the beginning of breathless laughter, like a chirping bird. The thoroughness of the declaration - no, the declaration at all - surprises him. He feels like he's being spoiled - gifted more than he asked for, grander than any offering he's been given.
He should hesitate - he should marvel at the beauty of it, before answering. But he'd accepted it instantly - insatiable as he is. )
Forever and then forever again. ( He places his hand over the back of Ish's, fingers slotting between his own. ) And only when it's really time to go. I wouldn't give up on you easy, either.
( Even knowing they'd be bound together in their passing, even knowing there'd be no parting - Ish does inspire in him a unique desire, through all his exhaustion: a desire to live.
Gently, and with warm waters and a clear sky, it begins to rain. It will soak them both, like a waves flooding into shore, if much more gradually. )
I want us to live a long, long time. There's so many things we haven't gotten to do together. There's so much time I want to spend with you.
( A kiss...! Light but sweet, like a good bye or welcome home at the entry way - a lovebird's yearning in the face of the briefest parting. )
... But, whether comes thoughtless wandering or reincarnation... ( Even though he'd considered reincarnation perverse! ) Whether we dissolve into a singular thing or drift onward, together... There's no one I'd rather spend eternity with more.
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the way he kisses back is like the droplets of water falling down on them, warm and pervasive. ]
Then we will. I'm still pretty young, but I'm also pretty sure I'm immortal now. [ something they can test...? or maybe it's better not to. ]
Oh, but I need to get you a ring to go along with it!
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Like me?
( Though, he guesses Ish doesn't know for sure. Living on, until interrupted - that's the sort of immortal Hwylryn is. )
... If you weren't, I'd do everything in my power to make it so.
( It doesn't matter if he doesn't have the power. He simply will, and that is that.
But, rings? Ah... His expression softens. )
I've seen humans do stuff like trading rings for marriage. If you're getting me a ring, I'll get you one, too. Can we look for them together? Can we have the colors match?
( Of course they can, but he wants to ask it anyway.
He'd never thought much about the tradition, but suddenly it has a sense of appeal, to him. It feels like - with Ish - these things that never had meaning to him before feel ... fresh, and new.
Within the rain comes the strong scent of sea breeze. )
... But I have another thing I can give you, before even that. I've been thinking about it since you left your mark on my heart.
( It's asking permission, in a sense - he knows it should be okay. He knows Ish would want it, too. But why else keep asking each other these things but to hear I do, I do? )
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They have to match, that's important. And I'll get to slide it onto your finger [ tapping hwylryn's ring finger! ] and you'll get to do the same to me. I want to start looking for them right away, too. Maybe after I get a nap in Elysia?
[ he mirrors in asking for permission when he knows hwylryn would likely be on board. but it is important to hear the confirmation, each one making his heart swell with more love. ]
Ohh? What is it? Do I get it now?
cw :catbite: (also, brief cannibalism sorta and slight gore)
Then I'll be excited, but I'll be good and wait. ( His eyes shine with anticipation... He does want it now, but!!! ) You better nap for a good while, okay?
( And of course, as always, he says yes. His hand slips down from Ish's cheek, finding the hand that tapped his ring finger, and pressing a kiss to Ish's ring finger in turn, as if that were its pair.
He won't even ask for a reward for being good, because Ish napping is, in a way, a reward for him, too. And if they didn't have a very mortal child, Hwyl would settle down with Ish for a good few decades, at the very least... So just A Very Long Nap will have to do. )
We~ll, if you want it tha~t badly . . .
( As if he didn't plan this entire time to give his gift to Ish now that they're free to just be as they are!!
He interlocks their fingers, somewhere in the sound of rain the gentle roar of ocean; somewhere in the soothing waters the spray of waves. Hwylryn presses his lips to Ish's neck without explanation, trailing down along the curve, sweet and soft and full of affection. And for a second - for a moment - it feels as if it's just them in the air; the breeze carrying in mist; the mist carrying in salt; like Hwyl had somehow stolen them away somewhere else - somewhere that resembles the depths of his fathomless heart.
His teeth sink in. He does not bite so much as he crunches into flesh, a procedure so raw in its strength and yet clinically mindful not to destruct the bone or stem or artery - he does not hope to kill Ish. Of course! He is sincere about their pledges into eternity. But a soft, happy mmmmh sinks into flesh, and his teeth scrape and split the open wound, swallowing what spare blood and flesh there is to keep, and the rain thunders overwhelming - not so much a shower but a baptism; a wave that crashes; a beast that swallows.
And with all this, the drama, the theatre, Ish will find the rain drenches the wound and steals away into him - not so much the water but the essence of that ocean, that breeze, that rain; the presence of it slips away into his blood to greedily circulate through his heart, to beat with him, always. )
My scent.
( There's a sing-song in his voice he hasn't had in a little while, an anxious excitement spill out of him and into Ish (and that's the weather!) - all of this an expression of his joy, his anticipation; he could have done it in no way less dramatic because that would not have been authentic to how intense he feels! The way he loves is this!!!!
He licks the wound, suckling at the gash with his lips and teething it light - affectionate and fond. Beneath the rain, Ish's wound can heal into a more manageable state if Ish allows it - but, if his heart would rather leave it be, then it will stay precisely as it is, Hwylryn nursing it with affection. )
I don't put my name on things the same way. ( Kissing at the glistening red, the sweetly torn meat along the interior of skin... His Ish, his Ish... inside and out. ) But all of this is me. So I hope you don't mind carrying it with you.
( Like the faint scent of incense, the scent of breeze and rain and ocean will hang about Ish like a haze - coiling like Hwylryn would: clingy, and - as of quite recently, courtesy of Ish - possessive. )
cw: slight gore cont
because having his muscles tensed when the soft kiss turns into a hard bite would have been really unfortunate. still, it's painful and he can feel that he's literally losing a part of himself (a strange realization for someone who was created by ripping off a part of herself). he hisses in one breath, a visceral reaction to what in any other case would be considered a violation (maybe it still is) and squeezes their hands together tighter in another one.
maybe it's lost in the downpour, but ish holds on. he accepts this...he wants this. though his body might have reacted initially like this was a reflection of the time he was tied to a pyre, it all begins to quiet when hwylryn speaks. he relaxes into it more, into the familiar feeling of hwylryn's tongue and teeth with a sigh.
the magic entering him is new though, and for a second he really does feel like he's drowning. as a being created of one person, for one person, his magic tends not to play well with others. the core of his being wants to fight it, this intrusion of force that isn't norna. she was his reason for being, his past, his present, his future: was. it takes considerable effort, but he allows hwylryn to subsume him, to fill in the spaces inside of him that had turned barren and acrid and beyond that. part of norna remains and will always remain, but it's much smaller now. it's a lot to handle, to go from being nearly empty to near bursting, but he'll carry this gladly; even as he slumps forward placing most of his weight on his new forever.
the rain continues to fall, the gaping wound closing just enough to ensure he doesn't need to deal with bleeding out in addition to the magic overrunning his body. the nursing of the bite is something he wants for both of them, selfishly. ]
Does that mean... [ the words come out slowly, thick like syrup. ] I'm a Witch of the Sea now? Your Witch...
cw: slight gore cont
cw; more messiness
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