Mesdames et Messieurs, Voilà, C'est Vous

[lesmodsalouette]

Bievenue

You're wrapped in a soothing, all-encompassing darkness.

Well, perhaps not perfectly all-encompassing -- you can see some slivers of light here and there, just enough to realize that your current space is literally wrapped in something, and that you are a highly customized burrito at the mercy of an entirely too fluffy bed and set of blankets. Moreover: you are definitely not alone.

Depending upon the contents of your bed (two of you, waking up dressed exactly in what you wore last you remember back where each of you came from, in the exact same state as those last moments no matter how illogical or disjointed), it may not be comfortable or feasible to stay cocooned up for much longer. There's a low, muted GONG, GONGG coming from not far away, your bed creaks like a beleaguered ship in an unannounced storm, and it is joined by even more noises of movement beyond the bed canopy as you try to take stock of where you are.

Eventually, you either fall out of bed or drag yourself into this world: your new and strangely crowded personal rooms, the clock insistently sounding out the hour, and the halls and heraldry of the venerable Château Ambregris -- a lavishly decorated and fully furnished version of a more-or-less authentic French castle (assuming you know what France or a castle are).

Left to your own devices for the moment, you may find it helpful to explore the castle for your own purposes, check out the suspicious statues and personalized plaques in the Promenade of Reflexion, or perhaps to try to get to the bottom of the mysterious and frankly alarming amount of bread piled up in front of the place settings in the Banquet Hall. (Were you thinking of escaping? Any attempts to leave the property will be met with no forward progress at all, treadmill style). There's just about every kind of loaf, roll, boule, baguette, croissant or even animal-shaped bread you can think of stacked in baskets. There's absolutely nothing else save for plain bread, but at least you won't starve.

[OOC: Welcome to Château Ambregris, a perfectly normal castle receiving perfectly normal guests. Feel free to ask any questions in discord! The NPC Meet & Greet will be later today, March 8 at 6 PM EST/3 PM PST.]

Locations Villa Main Nav

Comments

[ocenon]

There's an armory on the second floor, actually!

[ he's being helpful for the 0.5 seconds before ayaka's trying to jump in the line of fire, dont mind him. ]

1/2

[thesharpestroy]

...there's an armory. With loaded weapons. Ready for the taking like a fucking candy store for the NRA.

2/2

[thesharpestroy]

[Her gaze turns back to Witch again.] Holy shit, you are stupid. Or you have a death wish. But still fucking stupid.

[antemeridian]

For what it's worth, it is a fairly dated one. Swords, knives, halberds. Flintlock.

[ the kind of things Tomoe Mami would be more likely to use... ]

More of a showcase than anything else, but I suppose with enough looking one can still find something usable.

[ zero comment on what that says about their Witch here. ]

[thesharpestroy]

So just enough for us to start a prison riot and put somebody's head on a stick? Great.

[antemeridian]

Hopefully we will not resort to anything that drastic this quickly.

[ like, maybe get some more answers first? maybe. Witch is hardly a reliable source but at current he is also their only source. ]

[thesharpestroy]

We have until we run out of animal bread at least. I wanna avoid having a full-on brawl for the last rabbit.

[She keeps her tone light, as it sinks in that she's talking to a kid. This one can't be much older than Shiv's niece. Seriously, what is going on here?]

[antemeridian]

... There are some fruiting trees in the orchard outside. If we don't burn or cut them down first maybe we'll have that much longer.

[ she is. trying to match tone? she is very much aware of their situation, given her talk with their Witch here, but also... ]

[thesharpestroy]

Oh. We make the tallest people pick fruit as enrichment.

Think they’ve got a blender? Nobody who lives in these castles actually wants to live like a French king. Not enough personal hygiene.

[antemeridian]

[ immediately looks over at the

elf??? urianger is somewhere in the crowd right. those are some very realistic looking prosthetic/prop ears if they aren't real... ]

Maybe if they are busy picking fruit they will be too busy to do anything else. [ like putting people's heads on sticks. enrichment. ] As for a blender ... I don't know?

[ pause. ... wait. that's a good point actually. ]

I don't think I've seen much technology or appliances at all, now that you mention it.

[the_obedient_servant]

[A probably even younger kid pipes up.]

How are we to decide who we're eating first, though?

[thesharpestroy]

[Shiv scrunches her nose at that kind of comment from an actual Child. Is this what the kids joke about nowadays?]

Take a vote? I’m not leaving it to laws of the jungle. We’re civilized cannibals here.

[the_obedient_servant]

I'm going to rig the election through copious amounts of lobbying.

[calamitish]

[ Damn he regrets showing off his magic with those crystals. Making a face. ]

This is my pocket dimension but this building isn't mine either. It just wound up in here, so it's not my fault!

[ Still his fault. ]

[simulacres]

No, I'm pretty sure it is.

[thesharpestroy]

The kid's right. Should've done a fucking spot check on your pocket dimension.

[antline]

Spot.....check? Are there spots here? I didn't see them.

[thesharpestroy]

...no? Spot check as in like, going over your shit just in case something's wrong.

English not your first language? [She's not being fully judgemental. Sariel's getting the chance to prove he's not a moron unlike Witch, who Shiv has already dismissed as a moron.]

[antline]

Oh. I see. Thank you.

[He frowns a bit at "English", an unfamiliar word...but the gist is there. No, he knows what he speaks, but...]

There are still words I am...not familiar with.

[calamitish]

[ Making a face. Can he say anything against that? ]

...I guess.

[ Ayaka wins! ]

[simulacres]

Sounds like you do stuff like this a lot, huh?

[ she sighs. ]

You must give your teacher a headache.

[calamitish]

I was always considered the problem child.

[ Hehe. ]

[simulacres]

Not surprised. I'm starting to feel like I have a magnet for them.

[ she shakes her head. ]

Try not to do something crazy like turn us a different color or control us like puppets.

[distain]

[Hm...]

[arbalestrier]

[Without any trace of irony whatsoever:]

The guns aren't loaded. It would be dangerous to store them with a round chambered, so the ammunition was located elsewhere.

[Helpful....?]